I want to let you in on a secret today.
There were some things about uncovering my life purpose that I didn’t know and came as a surprise to me. Had I known these things in the beginning, it might have shortened my process.
I didn’t know I had an inaccurate picture of what life would be like once I figured out my purpose. I thought that once I “Knew” (yes, capital K, knew) what I was meant to do with my life, it would solve all my problems.
I had this vague idea that I’d figure out how to make all this money, that I’d suddenly be friends with all the right people. That I’d be happier; my life would be “golden.” I also thought that I’d somehow know exactly what to do with my business and brand. None of that was true…although the last one was made much easier by figuring out my life purpose, the truth was, I still had to make choices. And more than anything, I wanted figuring out my purpose to eliminate the choices by putting me on my personal “yellow brick road,” where at the end, everything just “worked out.”
I wanted knowing my life purpose to eliminate the stress and pressure of potentially making the “wrong” choice.
Today I want to let you in on what really happened after I uncovered my life purpose. In four areas, there were things that became awesome, and other things that stayed the same.
As you’re figuring this out for yourself, I’d love for you to have a better sense of what you’re looking for that’s right in front of you, and what you’ll have to work for, no matter what.
#1 I’m not happier because I know my life purpose.
I’m WAY more fulfilled, but I’m not necessarily happier. This was the biggest one for me to unpack. I love what I do. I’m never more fulfilled than when I’m doing the thing I know I’m built to do with someone. But when that moment is over? If I’ve been blue because of a loss in my life, or disappointment, I’m still blue. If I’m burned out because I’ve over used one of my internal resources, I’m still burned out. The metrics of happiness don’t change when you know your life purpose. But what shifted is that I sleep better at night because I’m satisfied with what I do every day with my time and choices about how I spend it. I never feel like I’ve wasted a day, or wonder if I’m headed in the wrong direction. The second guessing about what I’m doing with my life is over.
#2 I didn’t suddenly become successful once I knew my purpose.
I didn’t become the next internet star or suddenly make more money. My marketing skills and revenue generating skills are the exact same as they were the day before I knew my life purpose as they were the day after. However, I am WAY more focused than I’ve ever been about what I share. My message is consistent and clear. The stories I tell and the way that I market my brand support a clear and consistent message. This has created MUCH higher engagement around my content, higher opt-in rates and conversion rates. Launching is easier now. Content creation is easier. Speaking and interviewing are both easier. I receive more invitations now. But instant money, fame and glory? Didn’t happen. I still have to hustle for every like, opt-in and follower I get. I still have to learn marketing. I still have to network.
#3 My true friends and supporters? They didn’t leave me once I figured out my purpose.
In fact, these friends and I are closer now than ever before. All my relationships “right-sized” in the process of uncovering and committing to my life purpose. It brought my true friends closer: they completely understood my business transition, and have supported me through the messy and awkward process of transformation. Those that didn’t get it and couldn’t truly “see” me? Those relationships evolved or completed.
In class #3 of the One Life. One Purpose.™ Course I go in depth about relationships and who we’re attracted to/who’s attracted to us and why. I’ll summarize the nugget for you: the people drawn to be in relationship with you are attracted to you because they need your life purpose at that moment in their lives. (Likewise, you’re drawn to them because you need theirs.) The clearer I became about what others receive in my presence, and the more I aligned my business activities to doing that and only that, the more the people who needed to be in my life showed up to “have more.”
#4 I didn’t magically know exactly what to do with work once I figured out my purpose.
This is the crazy thing: the heavens didn’t part with angels singing the epiphany of my predestined path. I still had to choose which passion to pair with my purpose to know what to do next in my business. The choices were WAY easier than they were before I knew my purpose, but choice was still required. Continue styling entrepreneurs as I had been doing? (I love fashion and style, I didn’t want to give this up.) Or move on to branding? (Which allowed me to do more of my life purpose with more people.)
I constantly go back to my True Purpose Statement™ to help me answer questions like these before I make big decisions. And I ask myself: what’s going to let me do my purpose (because that’s the only way I’ll be fulfilled) and still have the kind of life I want? With this criteria, the answers are much clearer than they would be if the questions were things like, “What am I good at?” (A lot of things.) “What do people most want from me?” (Also, a lot of things.) “What is the best way to make money?” (Lots of ways.)
This is where destiny meets choice; where design meets evolution.
If you’ve been waiting for the heavens to part, and the angels to come down and prescribe you a path that was always meant to be yours, I invite you to try on this discovery I’ve made in my process: while there is nothing I was destined to do, there is a way I was destined to be.
What if, by following the design of who you are and how you “be” you create a path that feels better than destiny because you *chose* it and created it? (Without the unconscious compromise of who you are that comes with not knowing your purpose.)
I’m super curious what myths you’ve imploded as you’ve worked toward clarity about your life purpose, leave me a comment and let me know.